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This
Moe Is No Stooge
by Ron Doble
GolfNorthCarolina.com
Imagine you are waiting at the first tee box. The foursome ahead of
you is preparing to tee off, the sun is shining and there is not a
cloud in sight. All is right with the world. Then imagine you see a
seventy-ish looking gentleman walking around almost aimlessly it
seems while bouncing a ball off the face of a club ala Tiger Woods
and repeatedly muttering the same, indecipherable phrase over and
over again. You’re thinking, “Oh boy…this could be a slow round.”
You look closer and notice this old guy is wearing totally
mismatched clothing, pants rolled up halfway to his knees, swilling
a diet Coke with a left arm which is adorned with five wrist
watches! He sort of reminds you of a Three Stooges bit with Moe
Howard satirizing the game of golf.
Of course, in this day and age, a lot of us have played in
charitable tournaments for Special Olympics or the like wherein your
foursome, at least for a few holes, includes a “special” playing
partner. It’s a truly heart warming experience so you figure…”what
the heck, we aren't in any big hurry, it’s a beautiful day and, you
gotta admire those fellows for taking the old dude out on the course”.
Just as you are all feeling all warm and fuzzy for the opportunity
to witness these three guys “helping” this old gentleman…you can
almost hear "Kumbaya” being sung in the background……when, all
of a sudden, you can’t believe your eyes!
The strange old dude steps up, takes a split second setup and
hammers a 260 yard drive as straight as you have EVER seen ANYONE
hit a golf ball! The old guys picks up his tee and strolls off the
tee box muttering, “M.O.S., M.O.S…more of the same, more of the
same”
No, you have not just witnessed "Rain Man" at seventy years old; you
have seen the man who was once called "the greatest striker of the
ball in the game" by no less than Lee Trevino AND Sam Snead. Ken
Venturi dubbed him "Pipeline Moe" and his swing is so dead solid
perfect every time that the tee you just saw him pick up has been
with him since the mid eighties!
The man's name is Moe Norman and he is no one’s stooge. He’s a one
of kind, legendary virtuoso of the game.
Among golf legends, Moe Norman is talked about in reverent tones as
a man who, had he really wanted to do so, could have dominated on
the PGA tour from the Fifties on. By all accounts, the only thing
that prevented Moe from becoming a household name was Moe's own
legendary and multiple eccentricities.
He was, quite possibly, the quickest paced player on the planet and
abhorred the slow play of other tour players. He was known to lie
down in the fairway feigning sleep, openly mocking his opponents
whose glacial pace of play drove him crazy. Of course, for Moe
Norman, it wasn't a very long drive. A lot of people thought he was
pretty close to crazy already.
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Moe had sustained a head injury as a
young boy in Canada and apparently, no one appreciated the
severity of the injury and therefore, did not seek medical
attention. Some say that his parents were too poor to
obtain medical care. Whatever the reason, Moe was most
certainly forever changed by the accident.
Extremely uncomfortable in social situations and totally
devoid of any sense of fashion or propriety, Moe’s days on
the PGA were obviously and sadly numbered. He always
looked as though he dressed from a thrift shop trash bin,
Wearing seriously mismatched clothes and habitually
rolling his pants up above the ankles. He laughed and
horsed around at traditionally inappropriate times
both on and off the golf course AND participated in a
running feud with galleries almost everywhere he played.
His penchant for repeatedly muttering the very same word
or phrase multiple times during an era when few, if any of
his contemporaries understood mental disorders was a
definite problem for him as well.
The fact that he didn't appear to respect the game
or treat it as reverently as many tour players felt he
should made matters worse. Not only did his fellow players
not understand Moe, most, in retrospect, never even gave
him a chance. Due to these and other factors, Moe Norman
played on the PGA tour less than two years before he
simply walked away. No explanations, no excuses and
apparently, no regrets.
He spent the remainder of his competitive playing days on
the Canadian Tour during which time he won 55 events. Many
people back then referred to the tour as "The Moe Norman”.
After the financially strapped Canadian Tour dissolved in
the mid seventies, he won
seven straight Canadian Senior events, and came in
fifth the next year. He then proceeded to come back to win
the next one to finish his career with a total of eight
championships. In 1995, Moe Norman received the richly
deserved honor of being inducted into the Royal
Canadian Golf Hall of Fame.
Well documented stories of his outrageous behavior are
almost as legendary as his on course exploits but I think
a few of these golf feats stand above the rest....
He once hit drives for almost seven hours. During this
session, he hit 1,540 drives. Of these shots, NONE
landed outside a narrow, pre-designated 30 yard zone and
not even ONE drive was shorter than 225 yards!
How about THIS one....
Once, when playing a match with Sam Snead, the twosome
teed up on a par-4 which featured a stream. The small
stream ran across the fairway almost 250 yds from the tee
box. Snead told Moe he needed to lay up since there was no
possible way he could clear the stream. Moe told him he
wasn't going to try and clear the water. He simply said, "I'm
aiming for the bridge". Sam hit a lay up just short of
the stream while Moe landed his shot a bit longer. Moe’s
ball proceeded to roll across the little bridge and,
dutifully, made its way safely to the other side. Legend
has it Sam Snead never again offered Moe Norman another
piece of advice.
Then there's the
one about Ben Hogan and Moe hitting practice balls together back in
the 1950's. Hogan was famous for asserting that there was no such
animal as an intentionally straight golf shot. After watching
Moe hammer one straight shot after another for quite a long while,
Hogan just scratched his head and walked away suggesting that Moe
Norman "keep hitting those accidents".
In his career, Moe Norman has scored 59 three times in
tournament play and set over thirty individual course scoring
records. The man has registered 17....count 'em, SEVENTEEN
Holes In One! The story goes that eight of his "one
timers" went in ON THE FLY! Just to prove he's only human,
he's also scored FOUR Double Eagles! Once, when
Moe was putting badly and, as often happened, a hostile gallery was
harassing him about his putting woes, Moe pulled out an iron
on a par three, stated, “I won’t be putting today”. He
promptly holed out his tee shot.
After years of struggling financially, barely making a living by
giving demonstrations, clinics and, according to some, fleecing the
occasional uninformed duffer to help make ends meet, Jack Kuykendall
of "Natural Golf" fame signed Moe to a contract. Then, in
1995, the C.E.O. of Titleist read an article written by Jack
Kuykendall which likened his "Natural Golf" swing method to
that of Moe Norman's own legendary technique. In this article, Mr.
Kuykendall mentioned Moe’s financial struggles and shortly after
this, Titleist honored Moe by awarding him a contract of $5000.00
per month for life. When Moe asked what he had to do to deserve such
a contract, it is reported that Wally Uihlein, C.E.O. of Titleist,
told him to, “just be Moe”. How cool is that?
Fans of golf are the losers in this tale of Moe and his woes. Just
think of all the great moments we missed by not having Moe Norman on
the PGA tour. Golf is slow to change but, you have to believe, if a
modern day Moe Norman was joining the tour today he would be
welcomed with open arms. We can hope he would.
During his playing
years, many folks ridiculed him for his seemingly inexplicable,
clownish behavior. However, anyone who knows the true story...
this Moe was certainly no one's stooge. |
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